The Case of The Missing Smile
by smartylover
Summary: Those that make you cry, are the only ones who can make you truly smile again. MS
1. Chapter 1

Author: Caitlin

Title: The Case of the Missing Smile

Rating: PG 13 to R

Pairing: Martin/Sam (obviously!)

Disclaimer: not mine!

1.

"You know you could just talk to her!"

Danny's voice pulled Martin from his work…if staring at Samantha could be classed as work, which Martin didn't think it could as it was far to enjoyable task, actually being with her? Now that could be classed as work.

"What would that accomplish now?" Martin asked wearily, running a hand over his face and sighing.

"Well maybe, it might just mean that we'll all get to see Sam's smile again because I've gotta tell you buddy, it hasn't been spotted lately. Hey, maybe we should do a search for it, the case of Samantha Spade's missing smile, last spotted on…" Martin tuned out Danny's ramblings to return to his thoughts again. It was true, he had last seen Samantha smile over three weeks ago one the day he returned to work after the shooting.

Flashback

Martin walked cautiously into the offices after a month's absence. He still wore his left arm but he was fit enough for desk duty.

He felt his breath quicken as he spotted Samantha, standing in the break room. She had visited him, at least he was told so, everyday when he had been unconscious but after that, in the week he had spent awake and lonely she had only been once and that was with the rest of the team as well. Had it become that awkward between them? He inwardly sighed.

"Samantha?" he asked softly. She was Samantha again, not by her insistence but his own. Sam carried to many memories of late night kisses and heated arguments.

She looked up and her face broke into a smile that to Martin seemed to fill the room and she ran into his arms. This caught him by surprise and she knocked against his arm. He wouldn't have cared, she felt so wonderful in his arms again but she had felt him draw back slightly and heard his sharp intake of breath.

"Sorry! God, I'm sorry!" she said quickly as he cradled his arm against himself.

"Sam, it's fine, honestly." The name slipped out before he could stop it and though it bought a rush of images before his eyes, some good and some bad, it made Samantha smile.

"Guess I always manage to hurt you huh?" she murmured softly, her eyes downcast and he knew she wasn't only talking about his arm.

"Don't worry about it" he assured, and he meant it, life was too short to hold grudges, especially against the person you loved. Again she smiled.

End flashback

"Danny how many times do I have to tell you? She doesn't want me! She had a date with some guy last week" Martin said forcefully as his theories got too much for him to bare.

"Oh wake up and smell the coffee Marty! That was only after she heard that you had a date with the lovely Angelica from upstairs. She only did it to get back at you and I happen to know that nothing happened. She's lonely Martin.

"Yeah well, you know what? I'm sure that she can find plenty of people willing to keep her company" Martin sneered rather cruelly and resolutely turned back to his desk making it perfectly clear that the conversation was over.

"What upsets me the most, isn't that he ended it, I mean god knows why he didn't end it sooner…it's just he never gave me a chance you know, I wanted to try and now I'll never know what might have happened because I was to wrapped up in myself to even realise that I was pushing him away and now it's too late" Samantha flustered as she paced later that day in the break room.

She had been doing this for almost thirty minutes, it was a slow day and her paperwork was finished so she had nothing better to do then try and justify her feelings, not only to Vivian but to herself.

She had done a lot of pacing but Viv hadn't once interrupted her or made her sit down.

"It's just…hindsight is a wonderful thing, if I'd know how it was going to end I might have done things differently" she finished and sat down again as if waiting for Viv to judge her.

"Would you still have started things with him, knowing that they ended this way?"

This gave Sam pause. She hadn't expected such a blunt question.

"I don't know" she responded honestly "I've hurt Martin, more than I thought I could and I would want to avoid that…but that doesn't mean I regret any decisions I made on being with him!" she added quickly and Viv smiled.

"I never meant to imply that you did, merely that you've changed" Again Samantha paused, always wary of such judgements.

"Don't take offence but think about it, before you started up with martin, in fact even before you broke up with Martin, you were much less willing to discuss your feelings about anything yet here you are asking my advice. The relationship with Martin has changed you into a much more open person."

"Don't read to much into it Viv, I still can't share my feelings with the one person that really matters" She said with a wry and sorry smile and Viv shook her head kindly.

"Sooner or later, you'll both realise"


	2. Chapter 2

2

"So did you talk to Samantha?"

As he always did when someone asked him about Samantha he didn't answer.

"Oh come on Martin! It's not like I'm Danny, I think I deserve an answer you know!" Vivian laughed and he had to smile at that.

"No Viv I haven't, at least not about anything that isn't to do with work in nearly a month" he said tiredly

"Well if you want to get back with her then you going to have to change that aren't you" she replied knowingly and Martin looked at her incredulously.

"Who even said I want to get back with her!" he demands

"You do! Every time you look at her!" Vivian said matter of fact, and Martin smacked his head against the car window as Viv drove them along, keeping her eyes fixed to the road but chuckling at his action.

"Do you think she knows?" he asked desperately.

"Oh so you are talking o me now! Well that's a start! In answer to your question, of course she does, she's a very intelligent girl you know!"

"Oh, well that is just fantastic!"

"Don't worry Martin, god, the two of you are as stupid as each other!" Martin wasn't stupid either, he knew what that meant. Vivian had already had discussed this topic with Samantha. Surely she wouldn't have been very receptive to the idea of talking about their relationship though. Samantha hated people knowing about their relationship when it was still in the present let alone give it a post mortem now that it was over.

"I'm still hurt though Vivian"

"She won't hurt you again, she loves you…don't look like that, she's never said it but you have to have noticed. And she's changed Martin. I think if you went to talk to her you might not get your head bitten off!"

"She could talk to me as well you know"

"Martin don't be so stubborn"

"Yes Mom!"

They pulled up outside the house and all talk of Samantha stopped but her face swam through Martin's mind and thoughts of her haunted him. He pushed them to the back of his mind and did his best to concentrate on the case in hand.

The intrepid duo, know as Martin and Danny walked in together later that day, missing person safety in the bag and both with a cocky swagger in their step about a job well done.

"Great job guys, paperwork on my desk by tomorrow!" Jack's gruff voice called to them before disappearing back into his office, not seeing Danny's salute to the closed door, which caused Viv to giggle and Martin to laugh at him. Samantha merely looked up to see what all the fuss was about then looked back down at her report.

"Right guys, my young amigos, I have a family to get back to, I'll see you in the morning!" Vivian said chuckling at Danny's childish antics.

"Oh Viv are you not coming out to celebrate with us?"

"Not tonight guys. Bye" and with that she was gone, leaving Danny to turn to Samantha and Martin.

"Then you two are definitely coming out!" He said putting an arm around both of them and steering them to the door.

"Aw Danny come on, I'm tired!" Samantha protested but he wasn't having it.

"I don't care, you are not leaving me alone with Fitzy!" Martin elbowed him in the arm and issued a string of expletives in Danny's direction. She sighed and tried not to think about how much she would like to be left alone with 'Fitzy'

"Fine, fine I'll come!"

"That's my girl!" Danny cheered throwing his arm back around her shoulders.

Martin couldn't help but notice that if he reached out his arm around Danny, he could touch that blond hair that he still found on the pillows in his house and whenever he found one of his many combs. Tonight was going to be hard.


	3. Chapter 3

3

True to form Danny had left Martin and Samantha to go and talk to some hot girl by the bar, in a non-too subtle attempt at getting them to talk to each other.

As of yet it hadn't worked. They sat silently side by side in the booth, staring forward and absently sipping their drinks. Martin had hoped to talk to Samantha, indeed he had promised himself that he would talk to her but sitting there he was reduced to an awkward mess as her smell intoxicated him, filling his nostrils and making him dizzy. God, he wanted too reach across and touch, she was so close…if he just moved his hand a little to the left…just a little further!

Damn it! Samantha moved her hand to take a drink of her martini.

It was probably for the best, Martin couldn't control himself around Samantha, she made him do things through no fault of her own other than the way she bewitched him with her smile. Granted he hadn't seen her smile in a while…hmm, it must be something else. Was Samantha-ness a word? If not he was going to ring up the right people and demand that they made it one.

Yep that was it, Samantha's Samantha-ness was what made him love her so much, nothing would change that now, and he was hooked for life.

Time to take the plunge.

"So are we actually going to talk tonight or are we too far gone even for that?" Samantha turned her head to look at him, her eyes glassy from the effects of drink.

Thank god, thought Martin, I couldn't talk to her if we were both sober

"What do you mean?" she asked, looking confused.

"Well since Danny left us, in his oh so clever attempt to play matchmaker between us you haven't even looked at me, let alone talk to me!" he clarified.

"I told you two I didn't want to come out didn't I? Sorry I'm not the best company tonight." Martin bit his tongue from saying what he really wanted to say and looked at her. She was definitely sad about something.

"Want to talk about whatever it is that's getting you down?" he offered "I mean, we are still friends right? We should still be able to talk about things and help each other out."

Samantha looked down at her drink, anywhere but at Martin's sweet face.

"I'm fine." She muttered.

"Oh yeah right! Come on Samantha, we dated for nearly ten months! I know you better than that. Tell me, I'll help you" he said earnestly.

"As much as that sounds appealing to me Martin, the thing that is getting me down is you and this whole crazy situation that we've got going on, I don't know what to do Martin because I know I hurt you and I know that you will never be able to forgive me so therefore I should move on, but I can't move on when I see you every day and I don't even think I want to move on because then it would be like letting go and you can't let go of something that was the best thing that ever happened to you, even if you didn't realise it at the time." Samantha didn't know if it had been the drink or the way Martin's eyes bore into her that had made her say all that but it was out there now, she had nothing else to say to him.

Martin looked on at Samantha totally stunned. She sighed and stood up, grabbing her jacket and purse.

"I'm sorry Martin, for everything. Tell Danny I said bye, I'll see you tomorrow." She said not looking at him as she left their booth and walked out the door.

When Samantha got home she went straight to bed and cried her eyes out.

God, what the hell is wrong with me, tough Samantha Spade crying over her boyfriend. Ex boyfriend, ex boyfriend, gotta remember that. She thought ruefully as she wiped her eyes on the corner of what was his pillow.

As she went about her nightly routine she tried to pull herself together. It was so hard though, Martin was the one that was making her feel like this and Martin was the only one who could make her happy again. Kiss and make it better so to speak.

She padded back into her bedroom and flopped down on her bed, reaching across for her cell phone. Looking at the pictures of her and Martin together and reading the text messages that he had sent her always made her feel better. She smiled at one of the pictures that she had taken of Martin one morning. He looked so sleepy and rumpled, she couldn't resist taking it.

Her phone vibrated in her hand, giving her a shock. It was a text message from Martin. Her heart skipped a beat at his name next to the unopened envelope. She clicked read and a ghost of a long forgotten smile crossed her features as she read it.

"I know its hard Samantha. Dealing with all the office cupids around now I understand why you were reluctant to tell everyone. I'm sorry things didn't turn out differently. Maybe it doesn't have to end this way though. Love, M xx"


	4. Chapter 4

4

Two weeks had passed since Martin had sent Samantha that text and typically neither had spoke about it. It lay between them and weighed heavily on both their minds. Martin wanted Samantha but was scared of getting hurt again. Samantha wanted Martin but was scared of relationships in general. Scared off getting hurt, scared of hurting other people, scared of what people would say about her.

Insecurities on both sides holding them back.

Danny and Viv had given up on them. They waltzed to their own tune, flirting like usual and avoiding the actual real issue.

Now it was Jack's turn to take up the gauntlet and he did so late one night at work.

Samantha sat at her desk, finishing up her report when Jack came and perched on the end of desk. She looked at him briefly with an inquisitive look in her eye.

"How you doing Samantha?" he asked.

"I'm fine, don't worry I'll have this ready for you soon enough" she assured and resumed typing.

"Good" he said smiling at her but making no move to get up. When she became aware that he hadn't moved she looked at him again.

"Did you want something Jack?"

"Nope, I'm, good"

"Ok then…Jack, you're um, you're kinda creeping me out" she said with an uncomfortable little laugh and Jack smiled at her.

"Sorry Samantha, you looked like you could use a friend" he said apologetically and Samantha looked back at her work.

"Well that seems to be a popular opinion at the moment" she said pointedly not looking at him, eyes fixed on the computer screen.

"We can't all be wrong can we?" he pressed kindly.

"Look Jack, I appreciate the offer but I'm fine honestly, no worries." She said with false brightness as she turned the computer off "I'll give you the report tomorrow morning" and she stood up and grabbed her jacket.

"Funny what with you and Martin both in Gloomsville and Danny and Viv trying like hell to play cupid between you both, the office is getting kinda tense lately"

"Jack don't pull that card on me, I've told you before it is not affecting my work!" she protested sharply, turning around.

"Ha-Ha. Got you talking about it though?" Jack laughed pointing a finger at her. She opened her mouth to say something then caught herself and shook her head.

"I'm sorry Jack but you're really the last person I want to be discussing my love life, or lack of, with"

"I can understand that" Jack conceded.

"Besides we have been doing better now, getting along better. I'll be fine and your team will be back to normal before you know it."

"Believe it or not Samantha that's not what I'm worried about. I'm worried about you. What is it about him that's gotten to you so bad? And don't lie to me, because anyone can see that he has." Jack said. He remained sitting on her desk so as not to intimidate her or make her defensive. Samantha sighed and looked at Jack, and then her eyes involuntarily flickered over to Martin's desk.

"Honestly…I don't know. I think that's part of the problem." She admitted softly then looked down "But we all have the one that got away. He can be mine."

With one more, sad sigh she was gone.

Jack watched her retreating back. As much as he still cared about her he had to admit she hadn't even been this broken up about it when he ended things with her. Martin had gotten under her skin more than anybody had before.

On the ride home Samantha thought about what Jack had said. She didn't want Martin to be "the one that got away" she just wanted him to be The One but she was terrified of what tying herself to one person would mean. She knew she had to let go of the fears and that she was being irrational but she couldn't help it, that was who she was and who she would always be.

Her home no longer held any physical memories of him, they had all been gotten rid of in the weeks after the break-up but the presence of him was still tangible in the atmosphere of the place and the smell that lingered on his sheets. She knew one day that too would fade and she would be left with nothing but the memories of a great relationship tainted by arguments. What worried her most was that as time passed she wouldn't remember the good thing, she would remember the arguments and the cruel break-up. Then all of the good things about their relationship would be lost and forgotten in time.

Her resolve hardened. She didn't want that to be the case, and she would forever regret it if she didn't at least try for a second go. She picked up her phone and dialled Martin's number, one she still knew by heart and anxiously bit her lip waiting for him to pick up. After nine rings his machine got it.

"Hey Martin it's me…Samantha. Erm, I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go out sometime, I totally under- "

"Sam! Hi!" Martin's out of breath voice answered and Samantha nearly hung up there and then it would have been so much easier to do this to his machine "Sorry, I just got in, I had to get some groceries, what's up?"

"Nothing, I was just wondering…if you wanted to go out with me at some time, you know…on a date"

Martin paused a moment to think on this novel concept. In their whole time together they had never been on a date together, the possibilities thrilled him and terrified him at the same time.

"I don't know if that is such a good thing Samantha." He found himself saying and his heart clenched in his chest. Stupid head making him say the clever thing.

"Oh! Well, you know that's ok, you know I wasn't really expecting you to say yes, I just thought that I would give you a try you know, can't blame a gal for trying!" She aimed for light hearted but knew that she had failed miserably.

"Samantha I'm sorry, I'm just not ready yet" Martin apologised and Samantha took a deep breath.

"No, hey martin I totally understand, you have no need to apologise, I totally understand…erm when you are ready, do you think maybe you could give me a call?" she asked in a small voice and Martin couldn't help but smile at it.

"I don't know when that will be" he admitted softly.

"That's ok. I'll wait" she answered before hanging up the phone and staring at the object in her hand.

She felt defeated but oddly proud of herself. At least now he knew she was serious. She couldn't help but wonder how long he would make he wait. Would he ever be ready to forgive her?


End file.
